I woke up this morning thinking about today, the last day before I turn 50 years old. I have thought all day about what I have learned over a journey of half a century. The things I’ve matured into. The things I’ve done right and wrong. And the things I have yet to learn. What would I offer as wisdom to someone who is still young in their journey? Or even to someone who has walked as far as I have? Do I even have anything to offer? I find myself looking to those who have walked farther than I have and realize how far I have to go, how much I have to learn, how much growth I have left. Yet I also embrace my personal journey and would like to hold the space for others to step into it and connect with me in it, and me to connect with you in the same space.
Here is a little of what I have learned. It’s not how I learned it – that’s been a 50 year journey that I’m happy to share with you if you’d like to know more. But here are just a few things…
People are good. They really are. Things happen to us in life that cause us to act in ways that go against the goodness of the way we were created. This doesn’t excuse bad behavior. There is healing for those things that have wounded us.
It’s best to take responsibility for the things you do wrong and the ways you hurt others. It is a gift for the other person and to yourself. It is the beginning of healing for both. It’s not easy, but it’s freeing.
Humility is so important.
Learn to apologize.
Forgiveness. Forgiveness. Forgiveness. Over and over and over.
There is always something good to find in someone. If you can’t find it, look harder. I promise you, I’ve never met someone who I couldn’t find some kind of gem inside of them. And, it’s easier on the heart to look for the good.
What you look for is what you will find. So look for good.
There is value in viewing life through others’ eyes.
Authentically kind words and actions can soften the hardest of hearts.
Flattery is not the same as encouragement.
It’s never okay to be mean, belittle, or make fun of others.
It’s never okay to hate.
It’s okay to not be okay.
It’s okay to ask for help.
It’s okay to say no.
It’s okay to have boundaries.
It’s okay to not answer your phone.
It’s okay to take time to breathe.
Taking a risk of being hurt and letting someone in is the best way to live. Everyone needs others. Life wasn’t meant to be experienced alone.
God will use suffering and pain for good. Always.
Family is the most important thing – biological family, chosen family, or friend-family.
We are all equal. ALL of us.
All the rough spots, all the pain, all the struggle… God creates beauty out of it if we bring Him into it.
Every single person who was, is, or will be has something to offer others and something they can receive from others.
Every single person who was, is, or will be is valuable and precious and a treasure.
There is nothing you can do in life that will separate you from the love of God. No, not even THAT. God is waiting with outstretched arms, ready to be invited into your space.
Learn from your mistakes.
Mistakes don’t define you. They are opportunities to grow.
Embrace the present.
Allow yourself to feel. Don’t shut down your emotions. They aren’t bad, not even the painful ones. If that’s too hard, invite someone in to sit with you in them and help you learn to process them.
Make space for fun as a rhythm of life. Try new things, even if you aren’t good at them.
Embrace the curiosity of a child. Look at life with awe and wonder.
Be who God created you to be. It’s the only way you will be fulfilled and full of joy. Use your life figuring out and learning to embrace yourself.
Know yourself.
The world needs who you are.
We don’t have to agree in order to love and respect one another.
Give your all.
You are enough.
As I have been so pensive today, what I have been awakened to is that in my first 50 years of life, my journey has brought me to a place of truly embracing that Love is the answer to everything. Looking at others through the eyes of love, choosing to look for love, choosing to receive love… It’s not something I could have learned alone nor without pain and heartache. It’s not something I could have fully KNOWN when I was younger. But it is something that I know in the depths of my soul now.
If that is something you don’t know how to do (especially the receive it part because you can’t give away what you don’t have!), message me. I want to hear your story. I want to know you. I want to love you. Because YOU have something to offer. And if I don’t know you, I will miss out on something very precious.
What have you learned? What would you add to this list?
Transformation Journey 
Loved reading this!
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I I wish this was a poster!!!
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